Sunday, February 3, 2008

America Doesn't Suck

Though you may be thinking this is just a rant about people who think that America is the worst country in the world, it is not. This is just me venting about the flaws about America and why we have been brought into a vicious maelstrom. Especially our movies.

I don't want to get into another argument with the internet, an invention which I so nearly and dearly love. It is because I love the internet so much that I am making these points. So bear with me, it is just me talking, but I hope you'll care to listen.

So, as many of you may already know that Meet the Spartans, a recent spoof movie opened and made its way to #1 at the box office. Which strikes me as odd because movie goers and critics alike hated this movie with a well deserved fiery passion. And how Meet the Spartans makes #1 last week while Arrested Development is still canceled haunts me every day, but I'm digressing. Yes, Meet the Spartans is apparently a bad movie, judging its predecessor Epic Movie(Don't ask me why I paid a ticket, it was a conjoined mistake between a friend) it is pretty much one 90 minute long gay joke ripe with other dick-fart-tit-pussy jokes that makes its viewers want to eat their own eyeballs. Yes, it is supposed to suck. Hard. But that's still besides the point.

Call this backlash, but people on the boards who hated the movie automatically play a card. Not just any card, the America card. Sure, America is flawed. Our president is a moron, his henchmen are evil baby snatchers and we find two men in love a bigger threat then the terrorists, but putting all that aside, we aren't responsible for everything wrong in the world. And yet, people assume that because of our flaws that we thrive on crappy movies and other stupid forms of entertainment.

I will admit, we can make some lousy movies, our ratings board is a bunch of homophobic prudes but who doesn't make bad movies? To judge a country by their movies is just a meaningless task. Everyone will make at least some bad movies, it's not like one country is superior to another. I can bet that France makes plenty of cinematic enemas, but I only watch movies from there that interest me. Meet the Spartans only seems to appeal to incredibly stupid twelve year olds, and yet people are blaming the country that made this god awful movie just because they sat through it and were pissed off.

But what also gets my goat is how every country, not just other countries, act all arrogant and obnoxious when they say that their country is the superior country that makes only good movies. Since nobodies perfect, I doubt that.

In short, we all have to sit through bad movies, I should know, I'm a reviewer. But let me just defend us in saying that for every Meet the Spartans or Alvin and the Chipmunks, there will always be an Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind or No Country for Old Men. So, to paraphrase Field of Dreams, a movie I do not intend on seeing(But that's besides the point) "If you film a movie and it is good, they[the moviegoers] will come."

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ben Storey, will you marry me? I know that we're both young and you probably don't think of me more than just a friend, but it doesn't matter. I don't think that in my lifetime I will ever meet a boy that can share my opinions on so many things AND be able to voice them so strongly and clearly as you do.

-Maura

(And yes, the marriage proposal was a joke)

Sharon said...

"(Don't ask me why I paid a ticket, it was a conjoined mistake between a friend) it is pretty much one 90 minute long gay joke ripe with other dick-fart-tit-pussy jokes that makes its viewers want to eat their own eyeballs"

Hahaha, I 2nd Maura's proposal,
YOU ARE SO AMAZINGLY ENTERTAINING!

Reyna said...

Good post.