Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Tila Tequila Eats Puppies and Watches Kittens Cry

To the Picture to my Right: Why are you smiling?! I'm not! It's because of your show that I have become an embittered blogger with a heart of fire and a strong hatred of MTV. If this is the Zeitgeist, then I want out.

Aw...Now that was a little too harsh, wasn't it?

Um...No.

As you may already know, I have a severe distaste for a certain show called "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila" A show which is apparently a show so important that they(being MTV) decided to give the starletard the butt end of her fifteen minutes of fame. I think she's on 13:47, so we're close!

Now, it might be semi immature to accuse Miss Tequila of such heinous crimes. I'm doing the world a favor in hopes that they might be swayed by my accusations, which I'm positive are true. But that's just me. However, I will say that while she may not necessarily eat puppies, I'm certain that she enjoys watching her contestants eat goat(?) testicles. Didn't the Wicked Witch of the West do that to the Scarecrow before becoming a news anchor for Fox?* Oh well, I'm sure it's in there somewhere.

I'm guessing that you, the reader of my site, would rather see me review her heinous abortion of a program than simply tell you not to watch it, and instead watch something like this family movie from France or something a bit lighter like this cute little gem with an animated rabbit. I'm pretty sure you'd rather watch a movie that describes the pain you get from watching a small portion of an episode of Shot at Love.

Now, on to the review:

As you already have guessed, A Shot at Love is a very, very bad show. Not only is it very bad, but because of this putrid waste of air wave space as well as other shows that spawned this show from the back of the middle school x number of years ago, there are only more and more bad shows being produced.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you:

Celebracadabra
: A show about celebrities who team up with magicians! Hey, since when did Hal Sparks do anything else besides make out with Strawberry Shortcake?

Farmer Wants a Wife: Where, believe it or not, a farmer wants a wife. I. Kid. You. Not.

I Know My Kid's A Star
: Ten teams of parents and children go at it Lohan family style to prove that their kid is SO much better than your kid. So suck it.

Secret Talents of the Stars
: A show canceled after one episode which featured secret talents of the stars! Because my life would not be complete unless I saw Ben Stein do the jitterbug. See, if the title tells me all the show is about, I'll know how to avoid it. However, I'm sure episode two showed how far Pamela Anderson could stick a banana down her throat! LOL!!!!1 It's the 90's all over again!!!1

Man, sometimes, I wish I was joking. The writers return only to find that Reality TV has worsened, that people are actually making these shows and some folks are actually watching them. Which means only one thing: Despite the lack of decency MTV had during the first season, they decided to take another shot at love, and it seems to have worked.

Yeah, from the bit I saw, the people were arguing about something, probably involving mud wrestling or some incredibly hot and heavy sport. Some guy got injured, proving that love hurts! Tila made out with a female contestant while the camera man had a mini vacation. But this season, Tila has raised the bar, she's making sure that she is able to find that one person who she can fall in love with. Wasn't that her mission last season???

On a side note: At my friend's school, a student was accepted to be on Rock of Love 3. Which totally blew my mind, seeing as Season 2 had only just started. Would that mean that I'm right all along? That Reality TV is a sordid and horrific zone full of torment and fear?!

Well, except for Top Chef. Now that there is a quality show.

P.S This fall, more Pushing Daisies! So after weeping in a corner for a year, you can rejoice and sing for the return of the greatest thing to happen to pie since Waitress!!

*Disclaimer, I'm sorry Ann Coulter. I know it wasn't goat testicles you tried to feed the Scarecrow. You were just going all Ellen Page in Hard Candy on John Edwards. Can you still sleep at night? If so, you have no heart.

79 comments:

Platherific said...

Reading your blog only made me laugh at myself. I myself am completely guilty of being sucked into to Tila's pathetic "love" brigade. You make some great points, but I will continue to watch the rest of this season of Tila's show only so that I can prove my point that she will choose a guy once again because she is not anywhere close to being bisexual. Oh and you forgot to warn people of listening to her music because once they due, they are surely to combust.

Anonymous said...

love it or hate it. its still an obsession.

Anonymous said...

humshums probability agetotal acquisition peeling pooling jennifer pinansky irredeemable vivid dale
servimundos melifermuly

Anonymous said...

synchron lessee odrkc confirmatory rental oclc purification flat offset blogstreet signalling
servimundos melifermuly

Anonymous said...

This post presents clear idea in favor of the new visitors of blogging, that genuinely how
to do running a blog.
Also see my webpage - Audio Visual

Anonymous said...

Hello There. I found your weblog the usage of msn.
This is an extremely well written article. I will be sure to bookmark
it and come back to read more of your helpful info. Thanks for the post.
I will definitely comeback.
Feel free to visit my web blog ; unemployment benefits michigan

Anonymous said...

Good post. I learn something totally new and
challenging on blogs I stumbleupon on a daily basis.
It will always be helpful to read through articles from other
authors and practice a little something from their websites.
Feel free to visit my weblog :: Oregon mortgage aid

Anonymous said...

You are so interesting! I do not believe I have read through anything like
that before. So wonderful to discover somebody with unique thoughts on this topic.
Seriously.. thanks for starting this up. This site is
something that is needed on the web, someone with a bit of
originality!
My homepage ; Photography Tricks

Anonymous said...

great post, very informative. I ponder why the opposite specialists
of this sector do not realize this. You should proceed your writing.
I'm confident, you have a great readers' base already!
Also visit my site ; Full Post

Anonymous said...

Great post. I'm going through a few of these issues as well..
My website: seo company india

Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing such a good thought, piece of writing is pleasant, thats why i have read it fully
My site > view this site

Anonymous said...

Hi, all is going perfectly here and ofcourse every one is sharing facts, that's in fact good, keep up writing.
My page > check now

Anonymous said...

Hey There. I found your weblog the use of msn.
This is a very neatly written article. I'll be sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post. I'll certainly comeback.



Review my weblog :: st augustine mma schools

Anonymous said...

I have fun with, result in I found exactly what I was looking for.
You have ended my four day long hunt! God Bless you man.
Have a nice day. Bye

my blog post - Michael Hayden

Anonymous said...

hello there and thank you for your info – I've certainly picked up something new from right here. I did however expertise some technical issues using this web site, as I experienced to reload the web site many times previous to I could get it to load properly. I had been wondering if your hosting is OK? Not that I'm complaining, but sluggish loading instances times will often affect your placement in google
and could damage your high-quality score if advertising and marketing with Adwords.
Anyway I'm adding this RSS to my e-mail and can look out for much more of your respective exciting content. Make sure you update this again soon.

Feel free to visit my site - Thaddeus Darnell

Anonymous said...

I like the helpful information you provide in your articles.
I will bookmark your weblog and check again here frequently.

I'm quite certain I will learn plenty of new stuff right here! Good luck for the next!

Feel free to visit my website ... Will Jamar

Anonymous said...

Fine way of telling, and nice paragraph to get data regarding my presentation
subject matter, which i am going to convey in university.


Have a look at my homepage :: Zachariah Darryl

Anonymous said...

If you wish for to increase your familiarity simply keep visiting this web site and be
updated with the newest news posted here.

Here is my page; Tyson Dashawn

Anonymous said...

Hurrah, that's what I was searching for, what a data! present here at this web site, thanks admin of this web page.

Here is my web-site ... Wade Jaheim

Anonymous said...

I visited multiple websites but the audio quality for audio songs present at
this website is genuinely fabulous.

Also visit my blog - Titus Jasper

Anonymous said...

I visited multiple websites but the audio quality for audio songs present at this
website is genuinely fabulous.

Feel free to visit my web-site ... Titus Jasper

Anonymous said...

Howdy! This post could not be written any better! Reading through this article reminds me of my previous roommate!

He always kept talking about this. I will send this article to him.
Pretty sure he's going to have a very good read. I appreciate you for sharing!

Here is my page :: Trenton Jaime

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's what I was exploring for, what a stuff! present here at this weblog, thanks admin of this site.

Here is my website - Nathanael Luis

Anonymous said...

I like the valuable information you supply in your articles.

I will bookmark your blog and take a look at again right here regularly.
I am moderately sure I'll be told many new stuff right here! Good luck for the next!

My web site ... Max Jake

Anonymous said...

Hey! I'm at work browsing your blog from my new apple iphone! Just wanted to say I love reading your blog and look forward to all your posts! Keep up the excellent work!

Review my blog post - Marvin Jabari

Anonymous said...

You are so interesting! I do not believe I've read through a single thing like this before. So great to discover someone with a few genuine thoughts on this topic. Seriously.. thank you for starting this up. This site is one thing that's needed on the web, someone with some originality!


Also visit my weblog: Tre Isaias

Anonymous said...

Hey! Would you mind if I share your blog with my facebook group?
There's a lot of folks that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Many thanks

my web-site; Nathanial Howard

Anonymous said...

When some one searches for his essential thing, thus he/she wants to
be available that in detail, thus that thing is
maintained over here.

Look at my page :: Vance Isiah

Anonymous said...

I love what you guys are usually up too. This kind
of clever work and exposure! Keep up the amazing works
guys I've added you guys to my blogroll.

Look at my web page - Turner Malakai

Anonymous said...

There is definately a lot to find out about this subject. I
like all the points you made.

Take a look at my webpage: Titus Izaiah

Anonymous said...

I think this is one of the most vital info for
me. And i'm glad reading your article. But want to remark on some general things, The web site style is great, the articles is really great : D. Good job, cheers

Here is my page: Michael Jamel

Anonymous said...

Quality posts is the key to attract the visitors to go to
see the site, that's what this web page is providing.

Here is my weblog Mason Malik

Anonymous said...

It's fantastic that you are getting ideas from this article as well as from our argument made at this place.

Feel free to visit my web blog - Wesley Davin

Anonymous said...

hello!,I really like your writing so much! proportion we keep in
touch more about your article on AOL? I need a specialist on this house to unravel my problem.
Maybe that is you! Having a look ahead to peer
you.

Feel free to surf to my website Troy Jaheem

Anonymous said...

I'm really loving the theme/design of your web site. Do you ever run into any internet browser compatibility problems? A small number of my blog readers have complained about my site not operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Chrome. Do you have any solutions to help fix this issue?

Feel free to surf to my blog post: Wyatt Lucas

Anonymous said...

I absolutely love your blog and find nearly all of
your post's to be what precisely I'm looking for. can you offer guest
writers to write content to suit your needs? I wouldn't mind publishing a post or elaborating on a number of the subjects you write about here. Again, awesome weblog!

my web page - Wayne Jair

Anonymous said...

Heya i'm for the primary time here. I found this board and I in finding It really useful & it helped me out much. I am hoping to offer something again and help others like you helped me.

Also visit my blog ... Trevon Jakobe

Anonymous said...

Greetings! I know this is somewhat off topic but I was wondering which blog
platform are you using for this site? I'm getting sick and tired of Wordpress because I've had problems with hackers and I'm looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be great if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

Here is my blog Treyton Luciano

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your marvelous posting! I actually enjoyed reading it, you're a great author.I will ensure that I bookmark your blog and will eventually come back someday. I want to encourage continue your great job, have a nice afternoon!

Here is my page Maximillian Darrin

Anonymous said...

Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an really long comment but after I clicked
submit my comment didn't show up. Grrrr... well I'm not writing
all that over again. Anyways, just wanted to say fantastic blog!



my blog post - Maximus Darrin

Anonymous said...

What's Taking place i'm new to this, I stumbled upon this I've discovered It absolutely helpful and it has helped me out loads. I'm hoping to give a contribution & help different users like its helped me.
Good job.

Here is my homepage; Martin Jaquan

Anonymous said...

Woah! I'm really enjoying the template/theme of this website. It's simple,
yet effective. A lot of times it's challenging to get that "perfect balance" between usability and appearance. I must say you've
done a superb job with this. Additionally, the
blog loads extremely fast for me on Firefox.
Outstanding Blog!

Feel free to visit my web-site ... Vernon Jan

Anonymous said...

I delight in, result in I discovered exactly what I
used to be having a look for. You have ended my four day long hunt!
God Bless you man. Have a nice day. Bye

Also visit my page: Moses Harley

Anonymous said...

Since the admin of this web site is working, no uncertainty very shortly it will be renowned, due
to its quality contents.

My blog post; Maxwell Houston

Anonymous said...

Hi there! I know this is kind of off topic but I was wondering which
blog platform are you using for this site? I'm getting sick and tired of Wordpress because I've
had issues with hackers and I'm looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be fantastic if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

Feel free to visit my web site - Micheal Irving

Anonymous said...

Howdy, I do believe your web site could be having internet browser compatibility issues.
When I look at your web site in Safari, it looks fine however, when opening in IE, it has some overlapping issues.
I just wanted to provide you with a quick heads up!
Other than that, fantastic website!

Review my webpage :: Michael Darion

Anonymous said...

Hi, its nice post on the topic of media print, we all understand media is a great source of facts.


Feel free to visit my weblog Nicholas Marquise

Anonymous said...

I create a leave a response whenever I especially
enjoy a post on a site or if I have something to valuable to contribute to the conversation.
It is caused by the sincerness displayed in the post I read.

And on this article "Tila Tequila Eats Puppies and Watches Kittens Cry".
I was actually moved enough to post a comment :) I do
have a few questions for you if it's okay. Is it simply me or does it look like some of these comments look like coming from brain dead visitors? :-P And, if you are writing on additional places, I'd like to keep up with you.
Would you make a list every one of all your social pages like your twitter feed, Facebook page or linkedin profile?


Feel free to surf to my blog: Zachariah Marc

Anonymous said...

Attractive section of content. I just stumbled upon your website and in accession capital to assert that I acquire in
fact enjoyed account your blog posts. Any way I'll be subscribing to your augment and even I achievement you access consistently rapidly.

my website: Wyatt Houston

Anonymous said...

Greetings I am so grateful I found your website,
I really found you by accident, while I was browsing on Askjeeve for something else,
Anyways I am here now and would just like to say many thanks for
a marvelous post and a all round interesting
blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time to go through it all at the moment but I have bookmarked
it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time
I will be back to read more, Please do keep up the excellent b.


my web-site: Treyton Ismael

Anonymous said...

I always spent my half an hour to read this web site's content every day along with a mug of coffee.

my web site - Willie Jaquan

Anonymous said...

Wow! At last I got a website from where I can really
get helpful data concerning my study and knowledge.

my blog Nelson Jake

Anonymous said...

Hi, I want to subscribe for this webpage to take newest updates, thus
where can i do it please assist.

My web-site Trever Jaden

Anonymous said...

Having read this I believed it was very enlightening.
I appreciate you taking the time and energy
to put this information together. I once again find myself personally spending a significant
amount of time both reading and leaving comments.
But so what, it was still worthwhile!

Check out my blog ... Tomas Lucas

Anonymous said...

If you are going for finest contents like me, just go to see this website all the time for the reason
that it presents quality contents, thanks

Here is my blog post ... William Luciano

Anonymous said...

Very good information. Lucky me I discovered your site by
chance (stumbleupon). I've saved it for later!

Here is my page: Max Jahiem

Anonymous said...

Hurrah! Finally I got a web site from where I be capable of
genuinely obtain valuable data regarding my study
and knowledge.

my web page :: Wade Mariano

Anonymous said...

I was more than happy to find this page. I need to to thank
you for your time due to this fantastic read!! I definitely
liked every little bit of it and i also have you book-marked to look
at new stuff on your blog.

My web blog ... Mason Jaheem

Anonymous said...

Hey there! I know this is somewhat off topic but I was wondering
which blog platform are you using for this website?

I'm getting sick and tired of Wordpress because I've had issues with hackers and I'm looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be great if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

Stop by my blog - Mathew Hassan

Anonymous said...

My brother recommended I might like this website.
He was totally right. This post truly made my day.
You cann't imagine simply how much time I had spent for this info! Thanks!

my website ... Tyson Malakai

Anonymous said...

Hi there to every one, the contents present at this web site are in fact remarkable
for people experience, well, keep up the nice work fellows.


Feel free to surf to my weblog Warren Luke

Anonymous said...

Does your site have a contact page? I'm having trouble locating it but, I'd like to
send you an e-mail. I've got some recommendations for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it grow over time.

Also visit my site Moises Jarvis

Anonymous said...

Very nice article, exactly what I was looking for.


my homepage ... Milton Jaron

Anonymous said...

Hi to all, how is all, I think every one is getting more from this web site, and your
views are good in support of new users.

Visit my web page Nicholas Jamar

Anonymous said...

I'm really enjoying the design and layout of your site. It's a very
easy on the eyes which makes it much more enjoyable
for me to come here and visit more often. Did you hire out a
designer to create your theme? Outstanding work!

Here is my blog post: Trenton Jarred

Anonymous said...

It's really a nice and useful piece of information. I'm happy that you simply shared this helpful info with us.
Please keep us informed like this. Thank you for sharing.


Feel free to visit my blog post: Turner Darrion

Anonymous said...

Howdy! I could have sworn I've been to this blog before but after reading through some of the post I realized it's new to me.
Nonetheless, I'm definitely glad I found it and I'll be bookmarking and checking back often!


Also visit my homepage :: Zachariah Jaren

Anonymous said...

Hello! I know this is kind of off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this website?
I'm getting tired of Wordpress because I've had issues with hackers and I'm looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be fantastic if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

Take a look at my site; Maurice Hudson

Anonymous said...

Hey! I could have sworn I've been to this blog before but after checking through some of the post I realized it's new to me.
Anyways, I'm definitely happy I found it and I'll be bookmarking and checking back frequently!


Here is my web-site - Winston Jared

Anonymous said...

What a data of un-ambiguity and preserveness of precious experience concerning unexpected feelings.


Take a look at my web blog :: Weston Marcus

Anonymous said...

Simply desire to say your article is as amazing.
The clarity on your post is simply excellent and i could suppose you're an expert on this subject. Well with your permission let me to take hold of your RSS feed to stay up to date with imminent post. Thanks a million and please keep up the enjoyable work.

Also visit my web blog ... Muhammad Jacoby

Anonymous said...

I know this if off topic but I'm looking into starting my own weblog and was curious what all is required to get set up? I'm assuming having a blog like yours would cost a pretty penny?
I'm not very internet smart so I'm not 100% positive. Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated. Cheers

Feel free to surf to my blog - Milo Harley

Anonymous said...

This is a topic which is close to my heart.
.. Thank you! Exactly where are your contact details though?



Feel free to visit my page ... Tristin Marcus

Anonymous said...

Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board and I to find It really
useful & it helped me out much. I hope to present something back and aid others like you aided me.


Also visit my blog post Tyson Davin

Anonymous said...

My spouse and I stumbled over here by a different web
page and thought I should check things out. I like what I
see so now i'm following you. Look forward to finding out about your web page again.

Feel free to surf to my website www.xxxvideofix.com

Anonymous said...

Hello, its good paragraph concerning media print, we all be
familiar with media is a impressive source of data.


Also visit my site http://www.69videosporno.net/smiling-fairhair-babe-with-pink-nails

Anonymous said...

It is the best time to make some plans for the future and it is time
to be happy. I've read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or suggestions. Perhaps you can write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read more things about it!

Feel free to surf to my web-site - http://www.sexyhotgirlz.com/vspc-adrianna/

Anonymous said...

Great beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your site, how
can i subscribe for a weblog web site? The account aided me
a acceptable deal. I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast
offered vibrant transparent idea

Also visit my web site :: celeste porn star movie clip [snowmini.esu1.org]

Anonymous said...

It's actually very complex in this busy life to listen news on Television, so I simply use web for that reason, and obtain the hottest news.

Here is my web blog free movie porn russian ()